Friday, December 2, 2011

Para un verdadero amigo es alguien que no habla detrás de su espalda. Alguien que quiere que usted alcanzar su máximo potencial y no te arrastre hacia abajo. Un amigo a mi es alguien que sabe de me creencias religiosas y las normas y no se molesta cuando no puedo hacer algo o me empuja hacerlo. De hecho ellos me apoyan con mi decisión. Un verdadero amigo también le consuela a uno cuando está abajo. Ellos son su apoyo y becon. Yo si tengo poso amigos como asi pero son muy duros a encontrar y lo les valoro mucho.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

I made a tumblr. I like tumblr but I also like blogger.com.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Never have I felt so alone in society and so close to God till now.

Monday, August 1, 2011

haha i found this funny

"this body is a temple and you ain't got no recommend."

The 13th Article of Faith requires me to ask you out ("If there is anything virtuous, lovely or of good report, or praiseworthy, we seek after these things.")

What's your favorite Temple? Because you're mine!

God was just showing off when He made you.

Are you a gadiaton robber? Because u just stole my heart. 

Is your name virtue? Cause you garnish my thoughts.

Are you the iron rod? Cause I wanna hold onto you for the rest of eternity.

I want to be like the Spirit, to be with thee whithersoever thou goest.

 Do you go to EFY? Cause I'm Especially For You.

Even with the Liahona, I get lost in your eyes.

Are you a R.M.? Cause you're Rightfully Mine!

Me without you is like a nerd without braces, A shoe without laces, aSentenceWithoutSpaces.

If beauty were time, you'd be eternity. 

If I were a stoplight, I'd turn red every time you passed by, just so I could stare at you a bit longer.

Your eyes are blue, like the ocean, and I'm lost at sea. 

I hope you know CPR, cause you take my breath away!

I never need to see the sun again because your eyes light up my world.

Were you in Boy Scouts? Because you sure have tied my heart in a knot. 
When I look at the old posts I think what a dweeb. I see insecurities beyond belief. I want to become better now. I want to turn  a new leaf and start off new. And that's what I'm going to do even though I will still have to face problems from the past I know that I can do it now. Now I know for certain that my Heavenly Father loves me and always will no matter what I do. I just have to come unto him for forgiveness with a pure intent in heart and he will remember my sins no more. If he didn't love me I wouldn't have been put on this earth. Heavenly Father has put stumbling blocks in my way to make me stronger and into the person he wants me to become.

Monday, July 11, 2011

A walk to Remember (quotes)

"I might kiss you" "I might be bad at it"

"I told you not to fall in love with me."


Why is money always an object? I live in a middle class family. I like my life its comfortable. I understand we don't have everything, but its better then living in the projects. People in the projects would kill to live the way Middle Class people do. So Dad why can't you be happy with what you have? If we need a little extra money take some part time jobs or I can work just convince mom to let me work during the school year. Money is important to a point but in an instant it can all be gone and what you have left is your family. So isn't it better to have a good relationship with your family who you'll be with all eternity, then money that can burn and shrivel in a second.
I have a boyfriend his name is Marc. He's a really sweet guy. He's really into music. It's his life he knows all these great bands. But he listens to them for their instrumentation. He's not like me I listen to the lyrics and go into depth of what they mean. Haha we are very different people. I still have to get to know him better. I know that his favorite color is purple and that his birthday is this month and I don't know when. Which is sad because I should know. I also know that he doesn't like to dance. He writes music. But the problem is I don't feel like we are dating or that he's my boyfriend. I just feel like we are friends who just have an awkward annoying title. XP I don't know if I will feel that he is my boyfriend, but I guess its ok because then I won't freak out about being in a relationship. When I'm around Marc I want to be a better person. That's what I like about him.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

I was tempted

Today I went swimming at a friends house. There was a guy there who graduated a while ago. He went to my high-school. He's eighteen. He's tall and sweet. He was my best friend my freshman year. I would go over his house to get away from my parents and just sleep there.( I used to have a crush on him) I saw him today this is the second time I saw him this summer. I was confused because he seemed like he was  into me. So I acted pretty weird and pushed him away. But he said I was cute it made me blush what a nerd right. He would pick me up and throw me into the pool. And he would get really close and hug me. It was nice because I missed those types of hugs. But I would push away. He also wrapped his legs around me. I felt safe and scared at the same time because he could easy do what ever he wanted with me. (He is stronger then me and twice my size.) I kinda wanted to kiss him for just making me feel special. I haven't felt that way in a while. But haha probably not going to see him for the rest of the summer. He said he was going to Florida he offered to take me with him. I would say yes, but that would be difficult with my parents. (they wouldn't let me go with him :( )

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Not Fair

I'm just a joke to you.
You order me around expect me to listen
I used to look up to you admire you
but then I relized you don't listen to me
you just see what you want to see
you don't see that I'm unhappy
whenever I tell you something it goes in from one ear out the other
you tell me I can't hang out with people because you don't like my friends
you constantly say its to late to go out but that it's ok for my younger brother to go out but not me
don't you understand how much you frustrate me
I've been taking care of myself since I was little
you guys were never there when I needed you
and your never there now
When I cry you look the other way
I stop eating you tell me that I'm fat
I cut myself you yell at me for drawing on myself
There's so many times I want to scream
I question why I am here
I question why you say your my parents when you don't act like it.
Your just people who stop me from living life.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

yep this week sucks. from being sick. to losing a best friend. to having a wasp in your room. and crying n still being sick yep it really does suck


Mucous is gross
Mucous is Yellow
and being sick is very mellow
I wish I could go outside and play
without coughing up a glob of yellow.

Friday, June 24, 2011

Gahh XP read if you must but it's a fail

I miss the love notes.
I miss the touch.
I miss the secret glances
the inside jokes.
The stupid little arguments.
The little competitions.
The way I would get you
to spill a secret.
And how even when I messed up
and made a mistake
you would always looked at me
with those loving eyes
and try to make everything okay.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011


A kiss is something not to be messed around with. It says so many things words can't describe and so many different meanings depending on the time.

Friday, June 17, 2011

We Came As Romans - To Plant A Seed (Video)

This music video has a good meaning behind it

Beloved- Tenth Avenue North

This song is supposed to be a love song from god. But if you take god out of the picture you can see a guy singing this to a girl he loves.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

BTW Mice and Men is not only a book but its also a band for all you people out there who don't know.

My tummy

So here's the low down I never know when I'm hungry. The only way I know I'm hungry is when I feel dizzy, pain in my stomach, or I get heart burn. I have a pretty weird acid reflects don't I. But I also can't over eat or else haha major tummy ache. My mom says its because I'm not used to eating alot, but ehh its whatever. So yeah right now my tummy hurts so I must get food. But the weird thing is my body has been demanding food a lot more then usual oh well.

Of Mice And Men - Second and Sebring (video)


Monday, June 13, 2011

"But love is blind, and lovers cannot see 
The pretty follies that themselves commit."

~William Shakespeare

Sunday, June 5, 2011

You Said

You said you loved me
those are bitting words
I try to believe you mean it,
but then why are you with her.
I hurt all over.
I guess it's okay.
I've been surviving day by day.
I try to move on
you bring me back
I'm ensnared by your trap
but the thing is I don't fight back
I love you I hope you know
and I mean it.

Pulled Back

I feel like I'm holding onto a raft
I've finally been able to reach the surface
to take a breath
I feel the waters tugging me down
taking me back
awaiting my return.

Letting Go

My heart jumps my heart flutters
its broken pieces flying everywhere.
It hurts but it's healing.
I'm finally able to breathe in a breathe of air.
I miss him
I love him,
but he know's I'll always be there
he's happy that's all that matters.
But now it's my turn
I have to let go
I have to wipe away the tears
I have to let go of what could've been
and grab on to whats happening now.


When you hold my hand I feel safe
as if nothing could go wrong
all my worries cease
all the pain fades
its like everything that happened
didn't happen at all
I feel like I'm the only girl in the world.


When you look at me I think what a dweeb
Is he trying to impress me?
But when I look at you
I know I'm just as bad.
I feel like a little kid again
excited because you held my hand.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

By the way I know I'm just a teen. But I still love him. I'm adjusting to the fact that he's dating someone else. That he likes someone else. It hurts alot. I cry alot when people aren't looking. But its nice to see him happy.
I have nothing to hide that's how I feel. I published all the drafts I didn't post. I don't care what people say or think at this point. To me success is making it through the day. To me success is going to school and not let anyone break me down. To me life is just life. It can be over in an instant so why let others bring you down.


I'm sick of the rumors.
I'm sick of the lies.
I'm sick of the cruel jokes,
the pointed fingers.
So what I'm different,
so are you
get over it!
It's called life.
You don't think I know what people say
I do.
Our school is so small you need to be dead not to hear it.
I'm not oblivious.
I just ignore what you say.
Honestly get over the fact that I'm not the smiley type of person
So what I look sad
have you ever thought that I'm just pondering about something
I question things in life thats what I do.
If I'm mean to people its because I'm slipping up
and forgetting how I feel when people are mean to me.
Or I'm just being sarcastic.
Honestly I know I don't have that many "real" friends
but the friends that I do have I'll treasure forever
For them every tear is worth it
For them I'd give them the best
and get stuck with the crummy stuff nobody wants
For them I would do so many things because I know they'd do the same for me
And this is Highschool for crying out loud
I'm not trying to meet your expectations.
I'm not trying to conform.
I'm going to be me and smile when I want to.

Monday, May 23, 2011

My best friend

My best friend is Jake. He gives me motivational speeches throughout the day. He says I'm beautiful even though I think otherwise and shoot him down every time he says it. But that doesn't seem to faze him. I don't know what else to say about him. He's just a great friend. Maybe he'll rub off on me. I don't know. He's cocky but in a good way.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

I'm just a toy

You know what sucks I'm in love with a boy. He knows it too. I told him everything my secrets how I felt about him I've never told anyone that I haven't even wrote it down in my journal. But I broke up with him. During this time he held hands with another girl and I cried I bawled. I was hurt, but I still wanted him and still do. Then for a while he wouldn't talk to me so I hung out with my friend Jame. My friend Jame kissed me. I freaked out. I felt like I cheated on Brandon but he didn't want me. So I was confused and kept being friends with Jame. But Brandon thought I was over him. When really I was not I was dying on the inside. But then we went to prom together I wanted to tell him how I felt. But I didn't. I told myself I would go over the next day Sunday, but it was mothers day. By the next day Monday he had a girlfriend. I didn't matter. I never did.

I kissed him and he has a girlfriend and he kissed me back. I feel so much pain. I just feel like a toy. I regret not telling him all those months I regret being alive. Because whats being alive if I can't be with him. I don't think. No I know I won't feel this way about someone ever again. You may say you'll move on sure your only a teen.  I know how I feel.  he's the only one I've ever wanted to give everything to and I was too afraid and screwed it up. Now he will never want me.

Monday, May 16, 2011


If only you knew how I felt
I tried to be happy today
It was easier because I knew you wanted me
and you knew I wanted you
But it all came crashing down
when I saw her pull into your driveway
I was going over your house to tell you
that the words I wrote in that note were all lies
I want you more then anything in the world
I wanted to tell you so many other things
but my heart hurts too much right now
I can't breathe
my chest feels like its being compressed
my heart feels like its being squeeze
and stabbed
I want to feel numb so badly
I want to take the drugs to disappear
I want to run away from everything
I don't care what I leave behind
In the novel Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck relationships between the characters are essential to their survival. The character Crooks points this out. He said if you don't have someone you'll go crazy because you wouldn't know if what's happening to you is real.(this is explained on pg 73) Lennie and George are each other life lines. George needs Lennie so he won't go spending money on "cat houses" pg 11 and so he won't be constantly thinking about himself. Lennie however just needs George to keep him out of trouble. But together they both hold the dream of owning a piece of land and living off of it. They meet each others needs because George needs to be paying attention to Lennie and Lennie can just be himself reliant on George. Even though George says he could do so much without Lennie on page 11 he doesn't truly mean it because in the end he has the hardest time ending Lennie's life. In conclusion George never wanted to exploit Lennie because all the times he talked about him in a mean way talking about how dumb he was he said it with love he always said something good along with it. An example is when he's telling Slim about all the fun he had with Lennie playing pranks on him and him not getting it bit always being nice about it. pg 49

:P 4/5

In the novel Of Mice and Men different social problems in this time period are addressed. One is the treatment of blacks is unfair and poor. The workers on the farm treat the one black man on the ranch, Crook, as if he's worth less then them. When he can read and do as much as him. They won't let him go into their rooms, but they go into his. He tries to stop Lennie from doing into his, but it doesn't seem to work. He does this by pointing out "you got no right to come in my room. This here's my room. Nobody got any right to be here but me." Also they don't let him play cards but he knows why he can't play he said "I can't play because I'm black"pg 68 And when he was talking to Lennie he got all defensive about having a light when Lennie just said "Just come to look at my puppy. And I seen your light" pg 68 in response Crook said "I got a right to have a light" pg68 this means that other people who work here question what Crook has and try to take it away from him thats why he's so defensive. Lennie however even though he has special needs is treated better then Crook they don't try to take anything away from him. They treat him like a regular human being. They don't forgive him for the mistakes he's made he still has the same consequences the only thing that is degrading is when George says "Jus' tell Lennie what to do an' he'll do it if it don't take no figuring. He can't think of nothing to do himself, but he can sure take orders." pg39 He makes it seem that Lennie can't do anything by himself, but when Lennie does its the wrong thing. And since the world isn't ready for someone who doesn't understand how things work Lennie kills Curley's wife by accident and is put to death rather then getting aid for his mental disability. But in the end Lennie and Crook are in the same boat if they do something wrong or something that someone doesn't like they will get lynched that's why George killed Lennie as a sign of mercy and that's why Crooked back down when he was talking to Curl's wife when she said  "keep your place then, nigger. I could get you strung up on a tree so easy it ain't even funny." pg 81

More writting for class 4/5

In the novel Of Mice and Men by John Steinbeck there are two main characters named George and Lennie. They are very different from each other and the similar making the bond between them stronger. George and Lennie are similar because they are both related to Aunt Clara. They also care about each other deeply if something would happen to the other they would defend the other with all their might. This is shown when Crook tells Lennie hypothetically what if something bad happened to George and Lennie got all upset and started demanding "wheres George?" It's also shown when George is the one killing Lennie instead of letting someone else do it to eliminate as much pain as possible. They also both want there own land to live on together. But they are different because Lennie has special needs and George doesn't. Lennie constantly needs to be touching things and doesn't realize when his doing something wrong till he's done. But because of Lennie's differences George has someone to care for someone to look out for rather then thinking about himself and spending it all on the whore houses and drinking. pg 11. And Lennie has someone he can call a friend. In the novel there is a foreshadowing about Candy and his dog and what would happen to Lennie in the future. In this foreshadowing it tells about how Candy's dog was old and was in pain from being alive so Carlson wanted Candy to kill it but Candy didn't want to because he has had it since it was a pup. So Candy suggests shooting it in the back of the head so it won't know whats coming, but Candy refuses and lets Carlson do it himself. By the end of the book it was Georges turn to do what Carlson did to Lennie because Lennie was proving to be a threat to society. George could've choose to let someone else do it like Candy, but he didn't because he wanted to make it as painless as possible and he wanted Lennie to die with a happy memory. He does this by telling Lennie to look out at the lake and think about the ranch there going to get with the rabbits. Lennie like an obedient dog listens and does what he's told and Lennie shoots him in the back of the head to make it as painless as possible because he rather do that then let a lynch mob go after Lennie or for Lennie to spend the rest of his life in jail. When in reality Lennie didn't mean to kill Curly's wife and George had faith in Lennie till the end this is shown when George tells Candy "Lennie never done it in meanness, All the time he done bad things, but he never done one of em' mean."pg 95

My 4/5 english class

In the novel Of Mice and Men, John Steinbeck portrays the American Dream in a way that is unattainable. He does this by telling the about Lennie and George's dream. Their dream consisted of acquiring land and living by there own means instead of those of someone elses, hence the idea of living off the "fatta of the land." The only reason it was made impossible for these characters to reach their dream is because they were living in a time of economical trouble. No one was making progress. Each of the characters had there own chain holding them back from their dream. They were not all the same. Lennie had a learning disability that didn't allow him to function like anyone else and had gotten him in trouble on several occasions. Examples of this is with Curly himself. Curly had started punching Lennie just because he was smiling and Lennie didn't know what to do so he grabbed his hand and crushed it. Another instance was the the one that ended his life because he was a danger to society and the world wasn't ready for a person with special needs like him. This occurred when Lennie was in the barn petting the puppy and realized he killed it, and Curly's Wife came in and she told him to touch her hair to see how soft it is and Lennie liking it kept on stroking till she screamed "You stop it now, you'll mess it up." pg91 But Lennie tense his "fingers closed on her hair and hung on." pg 91 She had continued to struggle and started to scream. Lennie told her to stop and grew angrier and shook her until "her body flopped like a fish" "for Lennie had broken her neck."pg 91. Once Curly had discovered what happened he sent his men out to  find Lennie to kill him for what he did. Crook's chain was different he was the barn hand most importantly he was the colored man which played the whole role of him not reaching his dream. Crook had no respect from anyone because of his color he points this out when he says "they play cards in there, but I can't play because I'm black"pg 68  this is also shown when Curly's wife threatens him saying "You know what I could do?" "keep your place then, nigger. I could get you strung up on a tree so easy it ain't even funny." pg 81 making him diminish his dreams of ever leaving the ranch and being equal with everyone else. But even if these dreams are unattainable it still gives them the will to keep living and creating new bonds of friendship. This is shown when Crook allows Lennie into his room even though he's not allowed in his.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

I'm still in love you
I will aways be.
I thought I was okey when we broke up.
Because I thought we could be friends.
But thats not true I needed you more then you needed me.
You told me we couldn't be friends anymore.
I hated you.
I had nightmares.
Once track season was over
I didn't know what to do all my friends were your friends
I couldn't hang out with them without going into a conversation about you about how awesome you were.
I started pushing them away because I knew they would go out with you in a heartbeat.
Why wouldn't they? Your sweet your attractive your every girls dream.
Soon one day after school some friends picked me up we drove everywhere in town it was fun and scary and such a rush because they were driving so fast, but the songs playing made me think of you and how horrible of a person I am.
When I home I went into a closet and cried then I called you.
You were on your way to New York.
You seemed happy.
Thats when I decided to exit you out of my mind and not cry and be happy.
It worked. For a while I was genuinely happy.
I didn't hate my friends anymore.
I convince myself that I would be okay if you went out with another girl.
The past couple days however it all went down hill.
I started seeing your dream girl in the hallway.
I started not being okay with you going out with other girls
I started not liking my friends again
In fact I started ditching them avoiding them.
Then I started hanging out with guys.
Not the nicest of them.
Well the majority of the guys on the planet aren't very nice.
They talked about girls around me how they viewed them.
It disgusted me but ehh they were fun
they kept me from being home
and feeling utterly alone
even though i still was when i was hanging out with them
One of them was really sweet though
he had a crush on me
he didn't talk about girls the way the other guys did
he asked me out
I told him no
He asked me out again I told him no
He wanted to kiss me
I pushed him away
ha isn't it funny how i push everyone away even the ones i love
I'm probably going to die alone
so then I had this competition you were there
I saw you with your pale skin against your black hair and your eyes full of hate towards me not full of love like they used to be
I saw you holding her hand
You looked perfect together your fingers intertwined perfectly
Everything came crashing down the shield i built after my first kiss broke up with me it all came down
I bawled
I don't think I've ever bawled that much in my life not that you cared
I was a loser in my mind I hated you cause I loved you and I cried about you when I convinced myself I was down with you
Your sister eventually came up to me and said that wasn't your girlfriend
I started laughing a little
then hid behind my friends back and started crying again
I attempted to smile so they thought I was laughing
But I wasn't
I thought about the girls you liked and how I envied them all because they were lucky because they didn't screw up the chance with you
I kept crying throughout the rest of the day when people weren't watching because they threatened to slap me if I did they said you weren't worth it
Yeah you were worth it I was the only piece of trash around this planet and you look at me at the beginning and thought I wasn't.
I had thoughts racing through my mind about what to do when I got away from everyone.
I thought about getting home changing my clothes and running for hours on end around town till I passed out and no one would find me.
I thought about taking the big kitchen knife going into my closet cutting myself deep and just stare at the blood and know thats what I deserve
I thought about overdosing on the pills in the kitchen
I thought about going to my friends house and getting some beer to forget everything including myself
But then I thought about God and how much he would be disappointed in me.
It used to be my friends that kept me from doing stupid things
But my friends are no longer real to me
God is the only one who's been helping me stay alive and keep me from doing stupid things
I fear him and I love him
He's my best friend
On the way home I realized I do believe in my religion strongly because if I didn't I would've probably been dead at age six.
Thank you I needed to write this.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Quotes I love

"Today I choose life. Every morning when I wake up I can choose joy, happiness, negativity, pain… To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue to make mistakes and choices — today I choose to feel life, not to deny my humanity but embrace it." ~ Kevyn Aucoin

"To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable." ~ C.S. Lewis

Trust God from the bottom of your heart,
Don't try to figure out everything on your own.
Listen for God's voice in everything you do,
Everywhere you go,
He's the one who will keep you on track.
~ Proverbs 3:5-6 (The Message)

"We're never so vulnerable than when we trust someone - but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy." ~ Walter Anderson

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Ambulance by Eisley

Eisley is one of the bands that I listened to in middle school and still listen to. I've written about them before on this blog. The style of their music is Indie/ Pop/ Rock. The name of their new album is The Valley. And it is available on March 1, 2011 in stores and online. Their official site is http://www.eisley.com/index.php/

Monday, February 14, 2011

Why I suck at relationships?

Okey you must be thinking oh your a teen you shouldn't be worrying about relationships at such a young age, well thats a huge lie. Relationships are important no matter what the age because how your relationships are with parents, friends, brothers, sisters, etc. are essential to developing your future. Before I always thought that the person I would marry would love me for the way I am. Well guess what I'm not the most lovable person at times. If I was a boy and I was dating a girl exactly like I am I would dump that girl in less then a week. Sure it's important for the guy to love you as you are, but the guy is making the effort to make the relationship work and if you don't meet up with him and try your best its going to end like a mess like me and my ex- boyfriend.

I tortured him in our relationship meaning I was a horrible girlfriend. I was selfish. It was either you love me for the way I am right now or don't love me at all. And this guy adored me. He would do anything try to make me happy, but me as immature as I was I viewed his little loving gestures as an annoyance. And whenever we got into arguments on how I'm not  meeting him halfway or not even trying to make this relationship work or not showing that I cared about him. I would always say "well i didn't ask for any of this." What a snob right? Maybe if I knew what I know right now maybe the relationship could of worked out. But the past is behind us and I don't intend to try to go out with that amazing guy ever again because I don't want to inflict more pain and after what happened I doubt he'll ever view me as the wonderful person he fell in love with. All in all now that I've made the mistake I'm trying and learning how to become the kind of person I want my significant other to be like and I still have a lot of growing up to do before I can say I'm ready to have a relationship (that I will put my best foot forward in).

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

>.< Why is he in my mind?

What am I doing?
Why do I still have feelings for him?
We're like a double edge blade either way you hold it you will get hurt.

Why does it sting when he talks about other girls?
I should be done with this
done with him.
This is what I wanted
not to be held by chains
to run free
to have fun away from the complications of relationships.
Yet why do I feel like an endless wave of sadness washed over me
and the odor it left won't go away.

Sometimes I wish he'd look my way, but when he does
I remember the pain we brought to each other
and I look away
But sometimes I wish we could dull the knife
start off a new
but it was tried too many times
and resulted in wounds.

Friday, January 28, 2011

The Truth by me :P

You wanta to know the truth
Don't ya 
You are begging me to tell ya 
I'm kind of not the person you want 
I'm not the kind of person you need
I'm just a person you think you love
I'm just the person who doesn't know what she wants
I'm fickle as a fiddle 
I love to make noise
I love to run around all the boys 
In truth I love ya 
In truth I hate love 
It makes you hurt It makes you cry 
It makes you have butterflies all the time
You want to hear the truth
The truth is up to you
whether you hear what you want 
whether you listen or not 
we're only fifteen 
it's not going to workout
the whole world is at our fingertips 
I want to explore 
I want to learn 
I want to try new things,
but you have different goals in mind.
You just try hard enough to get by.
Our paths are different 
So this is goodbye.

All In All Is It Worth It? by me ;)

I love to look at people in love
I'm so grateful that that beauty exists.
Even though its not meant for me,
I love the way he looks at her
with those kind blue eyes.
I love the way she looks at him
not wanting to glaze away.
It's love
a hundred percent
not for me I'll always bet
I used to wish for that look,
but it doesn't seem realistic
I'm one of those cool chicks
I'm one of the gang
Guys look at me and think I'm a man
I shake things off
pretend to be strong,
but look where its got me
all alone.
Sometimes I wish for that moment
Sometimes I wish for that glaze
But when I think I've found it
I push it all away
I fear love.
I hate it.
It makes you irrational
It hurts when you've lost it
It hurts when you've got it
All in All is it worth it?
I Say Ye

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Parents by me :)

Mother day after day always working,
scuffing and toiling to make ends meet
at horrible jobs by honest means.
We hardly get to see her during the day,
but when night arrives
she still stifles the energy,
to see if we're in bed
and well fed.

Father works five days a week,
and always sleeps.
He has a tall deposition
with pepper hair.
Glasses high up his nose.
Tries to be funny,
but never knows the way his children
feel when their always told no
He doesn't want to understand.
He isn't their best friend.
He doesn't try to get to know them.